An Adventure in Loading a Camel!

Hello Children.  It is time again for Jimmy "Willy" Mercer to give you some social commentary on some of the hot topics involved in the world today.  Political, religical, smartical, any context is faire game (not Wack-a-Mole though.  That is the worst.  I am anti-molewacking).

So, way, way, way back in time Children, somewhere in the world where Camels exist people decided that it would be a good idea to measure things in Camel loads.  Interesting, right?  Yes.  Camels are very very cool animals and why would you choose any other kind of animal to load with your precious goods?   They are quick, quicker than horses even (at least in deserts.  Horses probably could outswim a Camel)!  What were you saying?  You would load your goods onto a goat?  What is this madness!  Goats?  Those devilish square-pupilled crisper-loving tin can-crunching demons?  If you are one of those goat lovers please leave this blog right now-

You gone?  C'mon goat-lover I don't accept your kind here.

Gone?  Good.  Now, sorry for that interruption Children, it is time to discuss those wonderful animals called Camels.  Camels are a curious thing.  They live in the desert and can go for a really long time without drinking.  It's awesome!  But, then we must ass ourselves (as the title suggests): how does one load a Camel?  Its a curious question.  Do they have saddle bags?  Do they have saddles?  Do they carry things in boxes?  Bags?  With the power of executive thought?  Its a conundrum.  First off we must ask ourselves what kind of Camels do you typically load?  Dromedary or Bactrian?  First off we must define each of these in a way that is simple for those who do not know which is which:

Well, that was fun and simple, was it not?  If I wanted to load a Camel I think I would go for the Bactrian (personally).  It may be so that those are the ones not usually loaded, but to be honest I don't care.  I am petty.  Bactrian it is.  But then, we must discuss, how you load it.  I assume there is some sort of saddle-bag technology in use, but how do I know?  Maybe they carry things in their teeth and Dromedary Camels have a superior oral cavity for carrying.  I do not know!  Its puzzling.  Also, how can you judge the size of a Camel load?  If I load something onto a Camel, that is a Camel load I presume.   How can you standardize that?  I imagine that somewhere in the Sinai desert, some whitty and malicious gene-mongering Camel breeder created the dreaded pigmy Camel.  Think of the economy!  Tiny little itty bitty Camels carrying what could only be defined as a "Camel Load" of goods!  Well Children, we can breathe easy that the days of our good friend Omar the Breeder are over.  Nowadays we weigh our useless goods in kilograms, meters, and dollars.  We do not feel the oprresive fingers of our trickster devil Omar running us for our money while we can do nothing but say "Bollocks, that wanker got away on his tiny little Camels and his legitimate business".  I did a final sketch, though forgive the quality, to give the final and overweening idea behind this perhaps overly long and bulbous (like myself) blog post.  

May you reap Camel loads of joy,

           Jimmy "The Camel" Mercer